Classic Punchlines from the Mick

(A late Father's Day entry.)

I have a strange sense of humor. My sister Megan believes (depending on the day) that I am the funniest person in the world. Sometimes, I am funny by being either intentionally unfunny or excruciatingly annoying. I do have, occasionally, some pretty good comedic timing and delivery. But often, I am the only one who laughs at my own jokes. (My kids think I'm hilarious, but they're sort of a captive audience.)

At any rate, whatever sense of humor I have owes much to my dad, the Mick. The Mick loves a good joke more than anything, heavily favoring the corny pun variety. From an early age, these jokes were fed to me at the dinner table, like a sticky dessert that you may not fully enjoy, but hey, it's better than no dessert.

In homage to the Mick, I am going to reproduce the punchlines only of some of his after-dinner classics:

• "That's ketchup, and that's mustard, but worchestershire sauce?"
• "You can't eat a pig like that all at once."
• "I'm a frayed knot."
• "It's a knick knack, Paddywhack. Give the frog a loan."
• "Crossing the state lion for immortal porpoises."
• "The Czech is in the male."
• "Bob and Bill checked out okay, but that Oink is sure one ugly fellow."
• "The pig liked the zoo so much that now we're going to the movies."
• "Remember the Alamo!"

Any others you all can remember?